Doctor called. So yeah, I have a few cysts on my right ovary and he says they should just go away on their own and to pop advil til then. I'd jump for joy over their harmlessness, but unfortunately they're still making me naseous as all hell. I can hardly remember a time when the thought of eating didn't make me turn green, a time where I didn't have to lay down every two minutes. I can't recall the taste of food, nor the sound of water, nor the touch of grass. 8D I may just hop back on the pill for a month or so, since I hear that can clear them up. I don't think I can stand being a sickly lump for too much longer. 

 So I might have an ovarian cist? I'm scheduled to have an ultrasound today to verify what it is. To be honest, I'm exhausted at the thought. I don't want to watch them wince when I say I have no insurance. I'm tired of feeling ill all the time, but I don't want to bother with anything. I know its irrational to not want to fix an obvious problem, but the thought of more debt doesn't make me glow inside.

 Alright, so donating plasma? Is horrible.


I did it for two reasons basically. To help with Christmas spending, and to try it once and see what it was like. Never again. Never, ever again. I showed up at the center around 9:00 in the morning since I knew that being a first time donor would mean I'd live out my whole life and die there if I showed up during busier hours. I should have been warned when it took approximately 157 nurses to find a vein in my arm worth using. I went with my boyfriend, but he got called in before I did so I got to sit around in the lobby for a whole hour before they were ready for me, too. I actually got hit on while waiting, wtf? At a donation clinic? Are you for reals, random guy?

Okay so cut to getting into the actual swing of things. They impaled my arm with a giant spike, right? (I always have to stare intently at the needle going into my arm or I just can't do it. I have to know when the exact moment of death will be or i'll jump and it'll tear my arm right off.) They kept having to remind me to pump my hand and eventually gave me a crumpled up ball of paper to squeeze cuz I obviously wasn't doing it right. Way to pump, me. I couldn't stop staring at the needle and tube and my arm and at the man who brought me to my doom. I texted him every little thing at first. "The needle still hurts." "My hand is numb now." "I think my arm is turning purple?" cuz I could just tell something was going to go horribly wrong. 

So yeah, I look down and blood starts pouring out around the needle and I wave down a nurse like "Uhm, I'm bleeding? Is that normal?" when it started to hurt and I saw my vein swelling up all huge. I'm apparently a huge wimp because then my stomach felt sick and I almost threw up and got all fainty. I started to sweat and my hearing left completely and three nurses were trying to keep me in the land of the living. ROFL. NEVER AGAIN. They just stuck my other arm after that and gave me all my blood cells back. Oddly enough, I couldn't seem to STOP pumping my hand after that. They told me three times that I didn't have to anymore but it just kept going of it's own free will. They finally took my paper ball away from me. :'(

So that was a while ago, anyway. The giant purple bruise blotch on my arm is just starting to fade. I think I was just having a bad streak of luck that week, because a couple days after that my car broke down on the side of the road in knoxville at 4am and I had to walk three miles to Craig's cuz my phone was dead. :( Oh, me. There's mud permanently ground into my cute little shoes.


SO, CHRISTMAS. I'm ready. Bring it on. Presents!!!